Once upon a time I used to post videos constantly on Youtube. Every now again I go back and watch these videos and long to sit in front of a camera again and revert back to 14year old Lucie. Being so confident without realising, being so open with the world.

As I grew older, the videos stopped. Not all together but I now dabble every now again showing a snippet of an adventure on my beloved youtube page. As I cant bring myself to sit and talk to a camera anymore.

But I love social media, I love sharing things, hence why I blog. I love Instagram so much I run 4 different pages. But theres one page above all that I control to no end. Its mine, my personal page. I control who sees what, you might follow me, but you might not be able to see my storys. I might find out that someone following me suddenly has been saying some pretty awful things about me and boom. They’re off my feed and im off there’s. But why? Why stop people from seeing it.

This page to me is a page I dabble in every now again with people who I know personally, and I share things I wouldn’t share with just anyone. When my niece was born my mind set changed. For when she entered the world there were people following me who didn’t have a single nice word to say about me for no reason but their own amusement. I can take hate, but suddenly as I posted a photo of her my heart began to race at the thought of these people who don’t pay a liking to my life seeing this precious little angel when they didn’t deserve to. And that’s when it started. My walls came up and suddenly, I was noticing more and more about the people we don’t realise we’re surrounding ourselves with accidentally. I now have a rule, if I don’t feel comfortable showing you a picture of my niece you will not be allowed to enter that part of my life.

A part of me hates that I have become so private for I once was so open to sharing everything, to not wanting to share a thing. But its okay, as you get older you realise people are worth protecting, even yourself, Over the feeling of being heard on the internet.